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I just never know how personal to make this bloggie thingie. I know I really shouldn’t. It’s that whole thing of really wanting to do something, but when it comes to the time of doing it, you realise it just ain’t right. I think thats right in this case, unlike that thing that you really should do but just plain don’t cos you ain’t got the balls to carry it through.
It’s that particular feeling that holds me back from so much, and the essence of what I’ve been thinking about over the last week or so.
I am too much of a personal person - yeah that makes no sense, I’m aware of that… I think a lot. I think too much. Thinking about everything about twenty times before actually doing it. This often leads to not actually doing, or saying, whatever it is. Of course I do occasionally say, and do, some pretty stupid stuff; that’s certainly no good either. I also generally regret it later. Everyone does stupid things.
In the last 2 weeks there have just been too many times when this has happened (not the saying stupid stuff) and it’s certainly not something that normally happens as often.
Hopefully this isn’t just a total bunch of crap that will make absolutely no sense to anyone… Yet at the same time, I don’t want it to make to much sense (yes I’m trying to be as subtle as possible), it just feels good to get it out.
So I almost feel that the time may have passed. I may have lost out. All the opportunities to say a few words in the last couple of weeks. It only really occurred to me recently that I feel this way. If I can’t do it now, will I ever be able to do it?
It just takes confidence - some balls, and confidence. To know what comes next. Does anything ‘come next’? Will anything ever come next? Putting yourself out there and making a move its tough. But heck, today I wore one red shoe and one green shoe - I can do anything!
Enough crap. Here’s a teaser of whats to come in the next few days
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